Blast from the past, part I: When the 90s go bad

Last week my mom brought over a big cardboard Xerox box filled to the brim with old photos that she asked me to scan to my computer. Now, so far, all these photos were taken AT LEAST ten years ago, although many of them are 20-25 years old. Like, I wasn't even born yet it some of them. But the great thing about going through 5000 old family photos is getting to see the fashion from that time period. And not the fashion that old magazines or old tv shows present; fashion that YOU YOURSELF wore. In real life. In public. Around other people. With eyes. 

The horror.

The wonderful, hilarious, ridiculous horror.

Shall we begin?

Thug life.
(Spring 1990)

A naturally-grown mullet.
(Preschool 1991)

I mean, there's whole lots of bad going on in this photo, but the thing
that bothers me the most is the big-ass stain riding front and center
on my overalls.
(Preschool 1993)

Apparently I used to have no issues with wearing pink.
(Spring 1994)

Was patchwork all the rage back then? Have I blocked this from my
memory so as to preserve my sanity?
(Kindergarten 1994)

I vividly remember this outfit. My grandma worked at a thrift shop
and I loved going there with her because she would buy me stuff.
Including this gray dress. (And yes, it was a dress. A MIDI dress. The
thing came to the middle of my shins. I mean...I don't even know.)
(4th grade)

Like...I'm pretty sure that wasn't even Halloween. (I'm on the right.)
(1992-ish)

Hark! the glory of tragic 90s fashion. (I'm in the middle.)
(1998-ish)

The best part about this photo is the placement of my popsicle; the worst part is...everything else. (I'm on the very right.)
(Summer 1999)

I mean...at least that was Halloween.
(2000 I think)

And I'll leave you with this, because:

1. I actually look fairly chic here. (At least, as much as a 2 year old can do chic.)
2. See #1.

Even if you think that outfit isn't cute, you can't deny that it's at least much easier
on the eyes than the rest of them shown in this post. (I'm in the forefront.)
(Late 1990/early 1991)

I hope you liked it, because there's so much more to come.